So today we're gonna be talking about affirmations (Something I talk to lots of my Hypnotherapy & Mindset Customers about) and I'm going to start with the fact that I don't believe that affirmations are a technique as such. Here’s a chat I had with a friend I’ve been helping using law of assumption.
Personally, the way that I see affirmations is that they are Thoughts that you choose. They can really help you to shift your Mindset from a place of lack to one of having what you want.
So we have they think about 70,000 thoughts a day and about 60,000 of those thoughts are the same thoughts we had yesterday So our brains really boring but we can use affirmations to like start to change what those dominant beliefs are.
CAROLINE:
What what what's your take on affirmations? Like how have you been using them?
SARAH :
I've been using them just to change like my whole mindset really and how I see things and how I see myself as well. So I started out with just the really simple ones, like Neville Goddard’s “Isn't it wonderful” Affirmation and “something wonderful is happening to me right now”
But also using them to change how I feel about myself using I AM Affirmations for example
“I am amazing”
“I am incredible”
It can change your your whole mindset in the space of like minutes, you can be feeling really rubbish and you can be thinking really negative things about yourself or about your situation. But then if you start doing these affirmations, something clicks inside of you and you're just like hang on a minute, no, I'm amazing.
Something wonderful is happening to me right now and then you just completely changed and you feel not happy again.
I think it does change other people’s perception of you as well because if you're feeling good all of the time people just feel it, they see it.
There’s a quote that sums up our experience in life that you told me once…. “A mirror cannot smile unless you smile.”
And that really, really resonated with me because I was thinking, yeah, if I'm miserable, the people around me are going to be miserable because I don't really want to talk about vibrations because I'm not really into that kind of stuff. But it does, they kind of reflect your vibration.
CAROLINE:
Is that the whole thing that Everyone is yourself pushed out. Everybody is your mirror. And the thing is the only thing that's creating our reality is our consciousness and there is only one consciousness So even they were in separate bodies, we are still one consciousness. So we're all connected.
Which is why when you start to change your beliefs and your assumptions about yourself exactly what you say, It's not just you that is changing, it's not just your mindset that's changing is the way that people start to show up in your life, the way that people treat you because they have to mirror back to you what those beliefs are about yourself.
SARAH:
Exactly. I think the Easiest one for me was just the way I was around the Children. you know if I'm in a bad mood and I'm I'm eggy and walking around feeling moody. They literally feed on that and then it's like, oh my God they literally drove me insane. So if you can shift that, you know, they are like so much happier now that I'm in a better place.
CAROLINE:
My kids are my biggest mirrors I know instantly what mood I'm in depending on how my kids are behaving. So yeah, definitely. Yeah. And plus you're around them like all of the time. So you know, you really do get to feel how you're feeling and what they are sort of projecting back to you about your mood and your state of mind.
And the thing is there's no denying that everyone is you pushed out And when I've been using certain affirmations consistently like again and again and again, it is absolutely crazy Like, people literally parroting my affirmations back to me word by word.
I expect I've told you about the time when I started affirming I am the woman that everyone wants to help and support and all of a sudden so I had lots of things that needed doing in my house at the time, I had doors that needed fixing, I had a room that was full of rubble that all needed taking out. And I suddenly had all of these offers from men like, can I come and help you do this? Like, let me come and put your door on for you, the electrician that was meant to be rewiring my house, came and turned up and took like four bags of rubble out for me, which was not in his job.
Nothing like that had ever happened to me before Yeah, and even like affirming the, like, “I'm a great Mum” I start affirming things like that and the kids reflect it, saying stuff like, you're the best Mum, Yeah, you are literally the best Mum.
It's so simple but so effective and and affirmations or some of the techniques that we'll talk about in different times. all of the techniques really are to get that internal shift.
You don't affirm to like suddenly see changes outside of you, of course that will eventually happen, but the first shift has to be within, because there's no one to change but self.
Affirmations are for me, the one technique that you can do whilst you're washing up, whilst you're driving, Yeah you can literally do them anywhere and everywhere, and you don't even have to be saying them out loud you can just do it silently in your head and nobody would even know that you're doing it, like you would with normal thoughts.
I remember when first realised that some of my affirmations were really like implemented I woke up in the middle of the night and said one of my affirmations to myself, I wasn't worried about a single thing.
I literally woke up in the middle of the night and I was like, “I am incredible”
So, even though I've been saying it for a really long time, and I think this is the other thing that a lot of people are like, well, what if I don't believe my affirmations?
SARAH:
Yeah, I think that I struggled in the beginning because I think I had quite a lot of self doubt, like, my relationship has just broken down when we really started speaking about this, I was in a job that I didn't necessarily want to be in, but I didn't really see a way out at the time.
It's completely changed the way I see everything and the way I feel about myself as well.
CAROLINE:
Yeah, and that's, it isn't like, there won't necessarily be the belief when you start affirming I am incredible.
You're affirming it, but you're not necessarily believing it, but when you repeat that again and again and again eventually, and I've said this to loads of my customers, like, the subconscious part of the brain doesn't have eyes.
So it literally only knows what we're telling it. So if you tell it enough times, “I am incredible.” Eventually, it's going to believe it.
I like to really embody my affirmations as well, like, you know, sometimes I will just repeat them if I'm doing stuff, but one of my favourite affirmations is I am the happiest woman in the world, but when I say it like I really conjure up those feelings being the happiest woman in the world, I've got like, a little visualisation I use along with it.
Another one of my favourite affirmations is “everything is always working in my favour.” so, you know that eventually, whatever it is, whatever situation you're in or whatever you know, self doubt that you're having, it's gonna flip and it's gonna all work itself out and work in your favour.
Our brain loves to seek evidence for whatever we're telling it, So again, that's you know how affirmations can start to shape our world is because if you're telling yourself like, I'm stupid, I'm ugly or you know, things are always going bad.
Your brain will literally be trying to prove you right!
It's the reticular activating system that's like, okay, this is this is what we do here and it starts to shift and change what you see in your reality as well as like manifesting.
SARAH:
Yeah, exactly. But I just think back to the beginning of the year for me so many things have happened to me since I've started doing all of these things with you, like all the techniques and learning all about this. So many things have happened that I just didn't even think we're going to be possible, I've literally had so many things happen… I was in Austria for a week, I'm going to Croatia on Wednesday.
Like these are all like really big holidays and traveling and things that I never ever thought I was going to be able to do. I was always really nervous about not having the Children with me and also that feeling guilty of doing something for myself.
It is really huge. I was always like the yes person, if anybody ever wanted me to do anything for them. I always just used to say yes straight away because I always wanted to be that person that was always there for people and you know was always like the friend that never let anybody down and things like that, but at the same time, even though I was that person for the, for for my friends and family it was massively affected me and my life.
CAROLINE:
And the thing is that people pleasing at your own detriment comes from a place of needing validation and needing people to like you, and the paradox is when you don't need that validation from anyone else.
You don't need other people to like make you feel good then people show up for you more!
